woke up to a phone call & blessings in the wait

first let me get to the phone call...just so no one gets excited for nothing. well just before my alarm was set to go off this morning, i hear a different sound coming from my phone. IT WAS RINGING!!! i look at the number and i do not recognize it, my heart starts racing. like big time RACING. well my sleepy brain was not quite at 100% yet and i did not realize that 866 is a toll free number...booo. i just knew it was "the call". i did not want to answer it with a groggy, just waking up voice (im crazy right!?) so i let it go to voicemail and immediately opened the internet explorer on my phone (thank you iphone) and typed in 866 area code, and then good old faithful  google let me know that 866 was indeed a toll free number. the excitement seemed to fade a little BUT i still thought it might be the call. then i listened to the voicemail...it was a collect call from a correctional facility. HA!

God had a sense of humor on that early sunday morning!! but let me just say that even though it bummed me out, it was so much fun to think that i was getting the call! it was so much fun to get that rush of emotions that i have never EVER experienced before. i felt extreme excitement, nervousness, a little fear...and MORE EXCITEMENT! i cant imagine what i will feel when i really get the call, and what i will feel as i am listening to a caseworker tell me all about my baby! ooohh...goosebumps!

So i have been wanting to talk about something a little different. i never expected to be able to talk about blessings of waiting. i mean, really- that almost seems like an oxymoron. how could waiting for the thing you have wanted for 20 years and have jumped through so many hoops for....how could there be blessings in waiting for that? the biggest blessing has been the way God used this time of waiting and is continuing to use it to draw me closer to Him. I love that even when things are so hard, when i feel so full of sadness and feel like this is never going to happen...instead of blaming God or turning away from Him, I am able to draw closer to Him!! He gives me peace when i need it most and reminds me of His promises. Reminds me that He is in control of this process, he knows when our baby will born, He knows what our baby will look like, smell like...He knows every single detail of our adoption. that is such a comfort to me! what more could i ask for then to know that my Lord, the one who knit me in my mothers womb, the one who sewed adoption deep into my heart as a young child...is currently knitting our baby together in his or her mothers womb...and preparing the birthmothers heart for the decision she will make...and putting together every detail until the day we all meet!?

*my dad keeps saying that he feels the 21st will be a very significant day for us! we will see!