A new door has opened!

ok ALOT has changed in our journey to parenthood. all good changes and we feel like we are on the right path. this week i was reading the blog of an awesome adoption momma Kristi (LLs mom for those that know her) well her post brought to my attention the HUGE need for adoptive families for african american newborns in the United States...as i was reading my heart began to ache in a way that i was NOT expecting. after reading this i immediately got on the website of one of the agencies that was mentioned in her post...and within minutes of that i was on the phone with the agency asking tons of questions.

is it really true that there is such a great need for these type of adoptions? are there really more birthmothers than adoptive families? could we really be matched in less than a years time? YES YES YES...the need is so great right now.

so my heart was getting totally caught up in the idea but then my head came around and started trying to mess with me...i started questioning it because we already felt like we were falling Gods will to Ethiopia, to do our small part of helping with the orphan crisis in Africa while starting our family...as im battling this out I hear God telling me...your heart is for the orphan, the orphan has no home, no family, no hope of a bright beautiful future...these babies fit that exactly. without a family to love them, care for, nurture, guide spiritually, feed, love, encourage, protect and did I mention LOVE them...then wouldnt they be headed for quite the crisis themselves?

so karl and i spent hours talking and praying...and praying & talking. we discussed it with family and then more with each other. we have reached the most exciting decision of our lives and we are very excited to announce that WE WILL BE ADOPTING AN INFANT THROUGH DOMESTIC ADOPTION!

the agency that we have chosen is Adoption Associates Inc in Michigan, and they just seem so incredible and i have already gotten the chance to talk on the phone with 2 different adoptive mommas who have recently used them. (thank you both so much) we are excited and we will be starting our homestudy either this coming week or early in the next. we anticipate the homestudy to take no more than 2 months (but hopefully a little less) and then we will officially be in the waiting to be chosen pool!

although our journey has taken a significant turn we still have huge hearts for the orphans in Africa and we will not stop praying for them until every child has a home and the orphan crisis is no more.  we will also still be praying for all the AGCI families that we have met and i will be keeping up with their journeys!

please pray for us and please pray for our birthmom. pray that she makes wise choices for not only her health but for the health of our unborn baby, pray for her heart...to prepare her to have strength as she makes this incredibly courageous decision for her child, and mostly pray that she knows Christ or comes to know Christ because I know she will need Him in her life!

P.S. we could totally have our baby in our arms before Christmas!!! Exciting right!?!?

Something Beautiful...

In your ocean Im ankle deep

I feel the waves crashing on my feet
It's like I know where I need to be
I can't figure out
No, I can't figure out
Just how much air I will need to breathe When your tide rushes over me There's only one way to figure out Will you let me drown Will you let me drown


Hey now, this is my desire
Consume me like a fire
Cause I just want
Something beautiful to touch me
I know that I'm in reach
I am down on my knees
And waiting for
Something beautiful

And the water is rising quick
And for years I was scared of it
We can't be sure when it will subside
So I won't leave your side
No I can't leave your side


This is a new song by NeedToBreathe and I think its amazing...for those of you who haven't heard it, hop on to klove .com and check it out. Anyways, i bring this song up today because this is my hearts desire...I want this to be the cry of my heart. Consume me like a fire...i want to be able to say without question that I DONT know when my these rough waters will subside but nonetheless trust that God is with me, and that I wont leave His side, cause I know he isnt leaving mine :)


I know that our adoption will involve lots of waiting periods and I expect each to be unique in the emotions that come along with it...but this part of the wait is very hard for me. Waiting until July before we can even submit our application (because of age) its so tough on me lately. I keep thinking of it the wrong way, i think of things like...by the time we are signed with our AGCI, and by the time we make it to the waitlist for our precious babe HOW LONG WILL THE WAITS BE THEN??? this thought worries my heart, God knows that I am so ready to be a mother, to love and care for a child, to guide them and teach them and be everything I can be for them...its hard for me to remember lately that God also knows who my first child is. He knows what they look like, what their name is...what they smell like, he knows how beautiful their smile will be...I really need to work on remembering that, because when I do I find comfort in it and it helps me to remember that he has the plans and the perfect timing.


I wish i was patient.


So I feel like I am at a unique advantage in this adoption world, because since this is our first child and since we have 5 more months of waiting before we even submit the application I feel totally capable of finding a part time 2nd job to help cover the costs of this adoption. The thought of it actually excites me quite a bit, sure I LOVE having weekends off, but who cares about that if it will help to bring our sweet one home a little faster. This whole 2nd job thing has proved to not be so easy though, i thought a night & weekend job would be a piece of cake to get. Not so much. About 5 applications in and no call backs...but Im not losing hope. Pray for us!